


the furries

by mikasasha



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: IM LA UGHING ReaLL Y HARD, Multi, my first time doing a crack fic please enjoy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-04
Updated: 2014-09-04
Packaged: 2018-02-16 02:10:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2251932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mikasasha/pseuds/mikasasha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>jean and sasha get captured by fucking furries. warning : EXTREMELY EXPLICIT extreme extremer than extreme</p>
            </blockquote>





	the furries

**Author's Note:**

> IM LAUGHING REALLY HARD I WROTE THIS WHILE I WAS INCREDIBLY SLEEP DEPRIVED HERE U GO
> 
> EDI T: i actually cut off like half the story when i first posted it so here is my tired 4 a.m. on a school night ramblings

"myeha-heh- my name is jean kirshitihieinienisihtn and im the biggest douche lord in ALl of Germany." sasha yells rly loud in french voice. "my hobbies include tryign to show of skills i donut have, making fun of ppl to make me feel bettr about my bitch ass, and pretending to say full sentences in french even though I dont really know the language at all- i just try to impress every1 i know. mostly every1 hates me so do i But does that stop me???" sasha hears connie laughing like a bitch ass poser. "non!" jean laughs 2 even tho sasha just shit on his entire life

"i would b angry but that was tru" jean said nodding his head and looking like a horse

"even the part where everyone hates u including urself"

jean smiles longingly in2 the sky "tru"

all 3 laugh bc every1 h8s jean

sticks and twigs and gross nature bullshit crunch under their feet ass they walk to some bitch ass cabin they bought bc they weird and if they didnt there would be no story even tho this story is a gigantic joke i shat out in one night bc boredom is strong

"how far away chrome head????" sasha totally pwns connie

"i carved how far away it is in2 that tree a few down u bitch" connie is insecur about his hair condition

"wow nerd ur so prepared the fuck is wrong with u" jean says bc he probably feels left out bc he is

"i walk around here a lot u horse dicktickle"

"aint u afraid of the bugs and the wolves that are gonna eat u!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" sasha totally screams @ connie bc isnt he afraid!! he is usually a little bitch

"that sounds hot" jean laffs

"ya animals r probably ur thing bc u r a horse" connie totally fucking OWNDE jean holy SH It

"that joke is so outdated omg shut up u fkn baldie" DAMN JEAN TOTALLY JUST FUCKING SMASHED CONNIE DAAAMMMMMMMNN

CONNIE RUNS AWAY CRYING BC THAT INSULT GOES FKN HARD

**********************************************************************************************************************************************

"i hear ppl omg!" sasha says and then pushes jean 2 the ground to get him to shut his long face up

they lissen at the voices that r coming from ppl that cannot be seen "wow look @ this guy u would really like to fuck him huh levi"

"no hes dirt" another voice says and it sounds blank at probably belongs to this.................. 'levi'

"ya but look @ his eyes they look like the color of water and water cleans things"

"wow ur right hanji but shut the fuck up"

and then the second voice is laffin like a bitch and then sasha and jean r being pulled up by their hair!!!!! then the person that is picking the two losers up begins to walk in2 the forest towards the voice and in the forest are 2 ppl and eren laying asleep on the floor like a little bitch

"caught these 2 posers listening in on our conversation"

"omg erwin shut up u werent even in this conversation" the short one says

the 2 ppl that are in the forest are obviously human but then they have wolf paws and wolf ears and wolf snouts and wolf fur!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"WE GOT CAUGHT BY FURRIES" sasha screams bc 4 her whole life she knew that someday the furries would come after her..................

the yiff is coming.............................................................................

**********************************************************************************************************************************************

sasha wakes up with a headache and looks up @ the sky and sees stars and she doesnt remember it being nighttime?? so she sits up and is like "ow my head" bc she is a little bitch

"my head hurts too" there is a fmilir voice and she looks and it is horse face

great. more horse jokes.

"thats bc u guys are fucking weak ass nerds" this girl with black hair and pretty abs says

jean and sasha kinda just stare at her bc wow

"u guys lissening in on our conversashuns?????????????????????????????????????????" the pretty black haired girl says

"bitch well fuck u up" its another person but the short furry. but he took of his fursuit so thank god

another person with freckles nods and then jean is like "bitch damn"

the black haired girl gets angry at jean and puts her foot on his face but lets all be honest he enjoyed it. all of us would enjoy it if mikasa touched us.

"i cant let u losers leave" the black hair girl says

"what!!!!!" sasha screms "why no!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"bc sasha ppl cant find out about our furry cult"

"I WILL GET OUT OF HERE AND REVEAL UR FURRY CULT" sasha yells and i think that is the single most valid threat i have ever heard

"if u dont i will have sex w u" 

Deal or No Deal, Sasha?

"i will not reveal ur furry cult"

Deal.

and then they fucked and then jean and marco fucked and then eren and levi fucked and then hanji and erwin fucked. and hanji is non binary so they probably topped the fuck out of erwin.

goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> my first mikasasha fic and its this one
> 
> fantastic job, kuma
> 
> please check out my other story it is not crack.
> 
> surprise
> 
> my tumblr is memekasasha and my domain is mikasasha.god.jp go crazy


End file.
